I can name at least 50 things that are terrifying about making a change, as you shift from what you know (and possibly hate) to what you don’t know (and think that you really want). With change, we risk regretting the good things left behind, and discovering that the new things are less shiny than they seemed to be from afar.
Yet, sometimes you can’t afford Not to change.
Here are 50 clear signs that you need a change:
1. You dream at least once a week about handing in your resignation letter.
2. You feel relief when the day is done.
3. You keep asking people you know what they would do if they were independently wealthy.
4. You loathe the sound of your alarm clock. (Ok, maybe you just need to change the sound of your alarm, but do make a change!)
5. You scream at someone every day.
6. You feel like screaming at someone every day.
7. The phrase “I can’t, because I have to…” comes out of your mouth naturally.
8. You want a vacation. After you just came back from vacation.
9. Moving to an uninhabited island doesn’t sound like a bad idea, considering everything that’s going on in your life.
10. Your stories end with “It’s not as bad as it sounds”.
11. You envy your colleague’s hot project, your neighbor’s hot body, or your friend’s hot “+1”.
12. You are bored.
13. You hear through the rumor mill that your job is going to be eliminated.
14. You never feel like kissing anymore.
15. You can’t remember the last time you’ve had an intimate conversation.
16. You take a long pause before answering a question: “What are you looking forward to this month?”
17. The last time you’ve watched a film, read a book, saw an art work, or heard music that you love was more than a month ago.
18. You call someone a “stupid idiot” at least three times a day. Every day.
19. You roll your eyes when anyone mentions a “gratitude journal”.
20. You feel like you have no choice.
21. You don’t taste your food – you just eat because you need to eat.
22. You have big ideas for writing three different books, and none of them are on the paper.
23. You are certain that it is too late to do something you really want to do.
24. You don’t know what to do other than errands when you unexpectedly get a pocket of free time.
25. When someone asks you at least once a day: “Are you ok?” while you believe that there is nothing wrong with you.
26. You procrastinate until it’s really time to do something else, and never get to that project you want to do.
27. You wish you were doing something else, no matter what you are doing at any given moment.
28. You wish your time away, saying “I can’t wait for this day/week/month to be over!”
29. You haven’t learned anything new today. Or yesterday.
30. When your boss suggests that you take a class, you whine to yourself about having one more thing to do now.
31. You think you’ve learned everything there is to know about your job.
32. You really look forward to the time your kids are grown-up. While they are still toddlers.
33. You buy a goldfish. Then a cat. Then a dog. But you still feel like something is missing. So, you have a kid, but the feeling that something is missing doesn’t go away.
34. You don’t want to tell your stories anymore.
35. You are tired. And you just woke up, too.
36. Your performance evaluation suggests that you need to improve your performance by 125%.
37. A year ago, you said that if you have to look at this project/colleague/apartment/commute/pile for one more day, you’ll shoot yourself. And you are still looking at it. (Not to say that you should shoot yourself – just to change something).
38. You can feel your blood pressure rising as you see a certain person. Every day.
39. You don’t laugh anymore – you just find things amusing.
40. You would rather go to the dentist than look at yourself in the mirror for 5 minutes (not counting the time that you need to shave or apply make-up). Go ahead, try it.
41. You’ve seen it all. You know it all. You’ve done it all. Nothing else can impress you.
42. Brushing teeth in the morning feels like a project.
43. You secretly believe that you are not good enough (smart enough, beautiful enough, interesting enough…)
44. You feel like you have no influence at work or at home.
45. You believe that if you stop doing what you are doing, no one will really care. And yet, you keep doing it.
46. Your kids tell you that you need a break.
47. You feel about 20lb heavier than you actually are.
48. Being spontaneous feels too unsettling, so you plan everything, and fall apart if things don’t go as planned.
49. You look at a picture of yourself from ten years ago and recognize that you are still wearing the same glasses.
50. You secretly hope for a moderately bad but not too uncomfortable cold so you can take a break.
If you are still nodding your head, admit it: it’s time for a change. I can help you walk over that bridge, because it’s my job, I love it, and I am good at it. Here’s where we can start: email me at Alina@MindTerrainCoaching.com and let me know which of the 50 signs made you say “Yeah, that’s me.”